This is probably going to be a shorter post than usual, but I just have to say a few things.
When I started this blog a couple of months ago, I intended for it to be a life coaching/motivational blog. Unfortunately, I have not been diligent about keeping up with this blog and I've done not only a disservice to those that come to my page to seek out tips and inspiration, but I've also done a great disservice to myself by not updating everyone regularly and holding myself accountable to my plans and goals. For all of this, I apologize.
Let me catch everyone up by telling you that I have not been sticking to my original weight loss plans. I do still intend to lose weight, but with everything that has been going on the past month with vacations, job transitions, and all of the stress that comes with that, I have lost sight of my priorities. The most important priority being, make time for me.
When I say, "make time for me" what I really mean is do something that's going to benefit my overall wellness, whether that's physical, mental/emotional, or spiritual.
Spiritual wellness is an area that brings a lot of peace to my life and keeps me in a place of correct perspective and focus. This is not an area that I slack in, in fact, most days I excel in it because I have such passion for it.
Physical wellness on the other hand is an area that I push to the back burner. I pretend there's not a problem because I don't want to add to life's stress by addressing it and doing something about it. The only problem is, I still become stressed even when it's not addressed because in the back of my mind I know the problem isn't leaving, in fact, chances are it's becoming increasingly more problematic. It's a vicious cycle!
So, as ashamed as I felt when I stepped back and took a long look in the mirror, I chose not to let that shame dictate my next action. Instead of choosing to wallow in self pity and disgust of my own body and lack of motivation, I chose to blog about it and bring that accountability back into my life.
As I write this, I want everyone to know that since my first major weight loss of 40 lbs a couple of years ago, I have gained back 11 of those pounds. I know that doesn't sound like a lot, but when you know how you felt before and how you looked before and then you see the extra 11 pounds attached to your body, it's a very discouraging feeling.
I'm tired of feeling discouraged. I'm tired of losing and gaining weight. I'm tired of feeling tired! With that being said, I'm deciding once again to shape up! I'm committing myself to change. I committing to a different way of eating, of moving. A different way of thinking. I'm choosing a different way to live! I want to take care of me! I want to lose the weight and keep it off! I want to be healthy on the inside and look/feel healthy on the outside. I know these wants don't just happen by sitting around wishing for them. I have to DO something. So, Day 1, here I come!
-Hope On-
